Hippy dating... I have been sent some hippy dating sites to try by some well-meaning friends, (yes, I know it’s time, but finding someone that isn’t quite normal is a hard task in any book let alone when you are half way up a Spanish mountain). I was advised by friends in the know that the better sites are the paid for sites. So I stumped up £25 to this one site, who shall remain nameless, (but the ones I tried are hippy ones or slightly alternative folk). I took the time to write up a profile and hit the ‘live’ button for all to see.
I must say I felt a bit exposed, as I’ve never done it before, particularly when a lot of men on there only have an avatar and not a real picture. Which I found slightly odd. Not that I am interested in looks only, but eyes are the windows to the soul and all that. Richard from somehampton looked interesting. He was into bushcraft and had just started teaching courses on it. I sent him a quick message saying Hi, and I’d just joined, that his interests were similar to mine and the site had ‘paired us up’ sort of thing and sent it off to his inbox. Call me old fashioned but I didn’t want to ‘chat’ with anyone else until I’d heard back from him! Which I am sure is not the way of it, but anyway, I heard nothing. I thought my months’ membership would expire if I didn’t move on so in my mind I finished it with Richard and moved swiftly on. If only he knew. Got another poke to tell me that I share interests with Darren from Bournemouth and off I went, similar message. No reply. Darren got his marching orders too. Then I started to do a little research.
What I discovered was that neither were active for some time, it seemed, and only paid subscribers could reply to my messages. The ones on there for free were just there to make up the numbers but couldn’t actually engage in conversation with the paid members. There was no way of knowing whether someone was a paid member or not, thus avoiding wasting everyone’s time so I emailed the site and said unless they make that information available I wanted a refund because it was misleading. There may have been no paid members at all and the entire site could be entirely full of men who can’t communicate. Been there before….why join a site ha ha! Had to say it!
I got my refund, minus the few days of wasted time, and less social interaction than I am used to ordinarily. The next dating site was a little odd. I had a look around the site and membership was £26. I moved on, can’t be bothered investing in it, I mused, what if they all run on the same principal? Closed the window down and felt my online dating days were over before I have even had so much as a message from someone. I had already had two rather disappointing ‘relationships’, that the men concerned didn’t know about, so I was done. Then, a couple of days later, and this may be a marketing ploy, I get a message from Happy Hippies (made up name) apologising for the site crashing the day before, (I hadn’t noticed) and by way of apology they wanted to offer me membership for a month for £1. (Which I accepted, rightly or wrongly). This was a hilarious pastime, not, as for the first three days it wouldn’t let me upload a photo of myself and the picture was returned to me with an email explaining it had been rejected due to it not being me. Umm, it was me actually and quite a nice one at that I have to say! But, computer said no. All these blokes were messaging me asking for a photo etc. But they seemed to be suspiciously a bot-like… messages like "hit me up"? and there weren’t really any hippies in the sense that I would call hippy. So I found a photo. Of Kim Kardashian. And uploaded it to my profile with the following tagline. “If you are in anyway drawn to my profile pic then I am not for you. Everything she is, I am not”. Bingo. It was approved.
I thought things were going swimmingly until I came across Fred Wests’ old profile, you know, the sicko serial killer. I kid you not. Bit off putting… says he would be 97 now. It doesn’t say he hung himself in prison, just that he is no longer active. Jolly good. I divorced Happy Hippies. Again, they don't even know! I work 24/7 when in the UK, so I doesn’t really leave much time for dating, but that’s ok as by the time someone actually reads my message, I too, could be 97. Most men who contacted me were 65 + (apart from one cheeky 32 year old, who was on there for entirely different reasons to me)! Not that I am ageist, I did have a fling with a 74 year old aboriginal story teller, and learned so much from him…you can read that blog here called a ‘A Fling with Francis Firebrace’ http://www.do-this-or-die.co.uk/blog-29-a-fling-with-frances-firebrace--aboriginal-storyteller-artist-and-ambassador-of-hugs. In fact, we are having a coffee and catch up in a couple of weeks. Perhaps my tagline may have been a bit off putting, or maybe the men on Happy Hippies do indeed want a Kim K? Upshot? Internet dating not for me. Gimme me my solitude on the Spanish mountain, a dog and my Red Tent Retreats. Yep. I am the original Happy Hippy.